it's been awhile, I guess that whole writing more didn't exactly pan out the way I expected. I often have the best of intentions but thoroughly struggle with the follow through. ADD plays a large role and also, lack of time management.
with that said here is another attempt. never give up trying I always say... or well just said.
2016 brought many changes in my life, a new job, a career field going well, Noah growing more and more physically as well as mentally and above all a daughter.
Having two children now I have never felt more blessed. With the new year here, 2017 I hope to write more and share with you all our adventures.
cheers to the new year.
Sunday, January 1, 2017
Thursday, September 17, 2015
been awhile
I haven' have a lot of time to focus on things I want to do lately, one of those things being writing. But all the same it's a part of me and since I don't have an exact "following" at this point yet, I figure a post late or not is still a chance for me to write.
Cathartic release.
Work has picked up, so busy I don't have much time during the day to do much else. I guess that's what work is supposed to be like in general but man, it's a lot of work ;) on top of that work load my boss and I have not been seeing eye to eye 100%. This would not be too bad if it weren't for me feeling like I'm being thrown under a bus. But I am a strong woman, I know my worth and I am hanging tough, while actively looking for other employment. I'll keep you posted on that front.
As for self care, well, I have been slacking. This past weekend I had a rather HORRIBLE experience while out with my boyfriend. Someone at the bar (I know what a great place to find solid opinions, but still) said something really horrific about me. To be honest it may have been the lowest I have ever felt about myself. I took that moment and learned from it however. Don't get me wrong I spent all of Saturday sad, I literally was on the verge of tears multiple times. Words are knives my friends, those scars don't fade. But after having my moment to wallow, I decided to make them EAT their words. I would use that hurtful nature as fuel to my fire of doing better for myself. Since that night I have been on a much better path of self care and care of others.
I don't get why people are mean like that, anytime I have been straight forward mean, it ate me up, EVEN if I was in the right. Some people though? They thrive off that, and that's terrifying to me. All I can think of is you must not be feeling very good on the inside to make someone else feel that bad on the outside and if that's true, than I just need to pray for you. It never pays to put someone down. We all do it enough for ourselves. I know I sure do. You don't have to tell me where I lack, what mistakes I made, they scream in my head all the time. I don't need reminding of my failures, I live with those scars.
Living with scars is one thing, reopening wounds though, or holding on to all the hurt that's another. As I get older, I want more and more to turn all the struggle & pain into something more.
I always Loved the scene at the end of the movie "8 Mile" where Eminem has to go first in the rap battle ( the one thing you don't really want to do) so instead of feeling defeated that he has to go first, he lays EVERYTHING out on the table. Every character defect, every failure, every time he got F'd over and then he hands the mic to the competitor saying "tell them something they don't know about me". It was BRILLIANT. He owned his flaws, you couldn't touch him in that moment.
I want to own myself more, to be grateful for the journey I am on, the body I was given and the struggles I have put it through. This is why self care is something I need to focus on more and more, which I intend to do. I need this focus as well so that the next time someone at a bar, or the place, or that phone, says something so off base, it can't touch me. Because first of all, it's fabricated and second of all, I know Desirae, you can't touch her like that.
Cathartic release.
Work has picked up, so busy I don't have much time during the day to do much else. I guess that's what work is supposed to be like in general but man, it's a lot of work ;) on top of that work load my boss and I have not been seeing eye to eye 100%. This would not be too bad if it weren't for me feeling like I'm being thrown under a bus. But I am a strong woman, I know my worth and I am hanging tough, while actively looking for other employment. I'll keep you posted on that front.
As for self care, well, I have been slacking. This past weekend I had a rather HORRIBLE experience while out with my boyfriend. Someone at the bar (I know what a great place to find solid opinions, but still) said something really horrific about me. To be honest it may have been the lowest I have ever felt about myself. I took that moment and learned from it however. Don't get me wrong I spent all of Saturday sad, I literally was on the verge of tears multiple times. Words are knives my friends, those scars don't fade. But after having my moment to wallow, I decided to make them EAT their words. I would use that hurtful nature as fuel to my fire of doing better for myself. Since that night I have been on a much better path of self care and care of others.
I don't get why people are mean like that, anytime I have been straight forward mean, it ate me up, EVEN if I was in the right. Some people though? They thrive off that, and that's terrifying to me. All I can think of is you must not be feeling very good on the inside to make someone else feel that bad on the outside and if that's true, than I just need to pray for you. It never pays to put someone down. We all do it enough for ourselves. I know I sure do. You don't have to tell me where I lack, what mistakes I made, they scream in my head all the time. I don't need reminding of my failures, I live with those scars.
Living with scars is one thing, reopening wounds though, or holding on to all the hurt that's another. As I get older, I want more and more to turn all the struggle & pain into something more.
I always Loved the scene at the end of the movie "8 Mile" where Eminem has to go first in the rap battle ( the one thing you don't really want to do) so instead of feeling defeated that he has to go first, he lays EVERYTHING out on the table. Every character defect, every failure, every time he got F'd over and then he hands the mic to the competitor saying "tell them something they don't know about me". It was BRILLIANT. He owned his flaws, you couldn't touch him in that moment.
I want to own myself more, to be grateful for the journey I am on, the body I was given and the struggles I have put it through. This is why self care is something I need to focus on more and more, which I intend to do. I need this focus as well so that the next time someone at a bar, or the place, or that phone, says something so off base, it can't touch me. Because first of all, it's fabricated and second of all, I know Desirae, you can't touch her like that.
Friday, August 14, 2015
where i belong
Okay folks, pull up the spotify, the pandora, whatever floats your boat. Search for Switchfoot "where I belong" start playing it and then proceed to read this post hahahaha. Or just read and laugh because that was a cute way to start.
No seriously though, this past Tuesday (I LOVE TUESDAYS) I was Blessed by an awesome friend Renee to go to "Tour de Compadres" featuring Colony House, Drew Holcomb & the Neighbors, Switchfoot & Needtobreathe. It was such an amazing experience I decided it deserved a blog post all it's own. I also waited a day or two so I could give this post the time and attention it deserves.
Oh man get ready for my cheesiness.
We first arrived at Wolftrap with plenty of time. We hit the loo, got some food, no drinking this evening, just some girl time. We stopped by merchandise and I wanted just about everything, got one shirt and decided I'd come back a little later. Good decision over all I think. We then made our way into the theatre to find that our seats WERE FLIPPEN AMAZING. Third row, center. I kid you not. The pit literally had seats. We could not have asked for better. Again RENEE is awesome.
First up was Colony house, my first impression of them was at the merch booth where I fell in Love with one of their t-shits, sadly by the end of the evening I had purchased to much so it didn't make it home with me but way to go for creative ranks. These did an excellent job. It takes a lot of guts to come on stage in front of soooo many that don't know you and really want the next band to play. The first thing I noticed was their stage presence. I must say through out the entire evening every band had AMAZING stage presence, but Colony House was the first and I was pleased. Good looking guys, great sounding music, and they are passionate, you can feel through their faces and I really look forward to what they come out with next.
Second was Drew Holcomb and the Neighbors. This dude and his suit and his beard. I felt hot just looking at him, but not ONCE did I see it affect him. He had such composure through out his performance. He KILLED IT DUDE. I can describe his voice in two words soo accurately... "Beautifully Haunting" I couldn't help but run to the merch table later that night a buy some Vinyl by him, yes Vinyl, I can't think of a better way to play a voice that golden.
Then this was the moment when it all became so surreal. I don't know about you, but the movie "A Walk to Remember" was like a STAPLE in my teen years, it might just be the soundtrack I've listened to the most, ever. On repeat. For years. I know all the songs. Every word. Obsessed much? More like obsessed with Love stories but this one was the movie that started it all. That sound track being mostly made up of incredible Switchfoot songs, which over the years have remained classics and allowed the band to make even more wonderful moments a long the way.
They played all the good ones, the crowd was in Love every moment, a one point they asked for all the lights to turn off and everyone hold up their cell phones (hello modern day lighter tribute) I swear, time stood still. Wolf trap is such a gorgeous theatre already, but with thousands of twinkling lights, it was breath taking.
Another point in the show they abandoned their instruments and huddled together and just jammed. I kid you not. They jammed 5 feet in front of me, I felt like maybe I was in their basement on a friday night after a long week. Just a couple of best friends, doing what they Love.
They were everything I thought and more. They were real, they were humble, they were grateful, they were good. They had so much heart in their performance. They were HAPPY to be there with us, They were happy we came. They were happy God Blessed with this night. You could see it. You could feel it. You could taste it in the air.
I could go on and on about Switchfoot but in all reality they were not the headlining band. They were in my brain but Needtobreathe had yet to come on. I ran to get more merch at this break and make it back in time to be put in awe...yet again. How many times for this evening? I lost count.
Needtobreathe literally sounded liked we were listening to a CD. They were flawless. They seriously are sooooo incredibly talented and give all the glory to God and I swear they deserve everything they get and more. They had a BEAUTIFUL show. It was sooo fun. They had TWO drummers, they pulled two members of Colony house to play with them the entire set. You get the feeling that this tour, when they are not performing, they are truly bonding as friends and building relationships between on another. I felt so honored to be in their presence just for an evening. The lights, the dress attire, the passion. I couldn't help but constantly notice the smile each of them wore. It was beautiful to witness.
It was also beautiful on my ears. If you have never give them a listen, please take a moment and do so, in fact do so for everyone I have mentioned tonight. You will be thanking me later.
The show came to an end like all shows must do and like most concerts there was an encore. I have to admit at this point I was pretty tired, super sweaty, and just happy & content. However, what was about to occur, I will NEVER forget.
First comes Needtobreathe... walking on stage to endless screams, bravos and woohoos, But as they start to play, Switchfoot walks on, they slowly start to join, and then Drew Holcomb, the Neighbors, Colony house, soon we have a full on jam session with the ENTIRE TOUR ON STAGE. I'm totally serious folks. I actually feel like I have a lack of words to describe what an experience it was. Again I just felt so Blessed and honored to be a part of the moment. Just some good ole friends, jammin out and doing what they Love.
You know what I took away most from that moment was? The amount of Gratitude I could see on the faces of the performers. We often forget that they are just people too. People like you and me who had their dreams come true. I saw one of them say "oh my goodness" multiple times looking out into the crowd at that moment, a few looked close to happy tears. When gratitude is palpable in a situation like that it fills me up. Good people deserve good things and I couldn't help but think in this moment that everyone on that stage deserved this Blessing. God was in the room with us, there was Love, there was talent, there gratitude and there was grace. It will always be a night I will never forget, and if any of the band members ever see this, I hope they know I say thank you, thank you from the bottom of my heart for letting us be a part of that moment, and thank you for savoring it just as much.
until next time folks, over and out.
No seriously though, this past Tuesday (I LOVE TUESDAYS) I was Blessed by an awesome friend Renee to go to "Tour de Compadres" featuring Colony House, Drew Holcomb & the Neighbors, Switchfoot & Needtobreathe. It was such an amazing experience I decided it deserved a blog post all it's own. I also waited a day or two so I could give this post the time and attention it deserves.
Oh man get ready for my cheesiness.
We first arrived at Wolftrap with plenty of time. We hit the loo, got some food, no drinking this evening, just some girl time. We stopped by merchandise and I wanted just about everything, got one shirt and decided I'd come back a little later. Good decision over all I think. We then made our way into the theatre to find that our seats WERE FLIPPEN AMAZING. Third row, center. I kid you not. The pit literally had seats. We could not have asked for better. Again RENEE is awesome.
First up was Colony house, my first impression of them was at the merch booth where I fell in Love with one of their t-shits, sadly by the end of the evening I had purchased to much so it didn't make it home with me but way to go for creative ranks. These did an excellent job. It takes a lot of guts to come on stage in front of soooo many that don't know you and really want the next band to play. The first thing I noticed was their stage presence. I must say through out the entire evening every band had AMAZING stage presence, but Colony House was the first and I was pleased. Good looking guys, great sounding music, and they are passionate, you can feel through their faces and I really look forward to what they come out with next.
Second was Drew Holcomb and the Neighbors. This dude and his suit and his beard. I felt hot just looking at him, but not ONCE did I see it affect him. He had such composure through out his performance. He KILLED IT DUDE. I can describe his voice in two words soo accurately... "Beautifully Haunting" I couldn't help but run to the merch table later that night a buy some Vinyl by him, yes Vinyl, I can't think of a better way to play a voice that golden.
Then this was the moment when it all became so surreal. I don't know about you, but the movie "A Walk to Remember" was like a STAPLE in my teen years, it might just be the soundtrack I've listened to the most, ever. On repeat. For years. I know all the songs. Every word. Obsessed much? More like obsessed with Love stories but this one was the movie that started it all. That sound track being mostly made up of incredible Switchfoot songs, which over the years have remained classics and allowed the band to make even more wonderful moments a long the way.
They played all the good ones, the crowd was in Love every moment, a one point they asked for all the lights to turn off and everyone hold up their cell phones (hello modern day lighter tribute) I swear, time stood still. Wolf trap is such a gorgeous theatre already, but with thousands of twinkling lights, it was breath taking.
Another point in the show they abandoned their instruments and huddled together and just jammed. I kid you not. They jammed 5 feet in front of me, I felt like maybe I was in their basement on a friday night after a long week. Just a couple of best friends, doing what they Love.
They were everything I thought and more. They were real, they were humble, they were grateful, they were good. They had so much heart in their performance. They were HAPPY to be there with us, They were happy we came. They were happy God Blessed with this night. You could see it. You could feel it. You could taste it in the air.
I could go on and on about Switchfoot but in all reality they were not the headlining band. They were in my brain but Needtobreathe had yet to come on. I ran to get more merch at this break and make it back in time to be put in awe...yet again. How many times for this evening? I lost count.
Needtobreathe literally sounded liked we were listening to a CD. They were flawless. They seriously are sooooo incredibly talented and give all the glory to God and I swear they deserve everything they get and more. They had a BEAUTIFUL show. It was sooo fun. They had TWO drummers, they pulled two members of Colony house to play with them the entire set. You get the feeling that this tour, when they are not performing, they are truly bonding as friends and building relationships between on another. I felt so honored to be in their presence just for an evening. The lights, the dress attire, the passion. I couldn't help but constantly notice the smile each of them wore. It was beautiful to witness.
It was also beautiful on my ears. If you have never give them a listen, please take a moment and do so, in fact do so for everyone I have mentioned tonight. You will be thanking me later.
The show came to an end like all shows must do and like most concerts there was an encore. I have to admit at this point I was pretty tired, super sweaty, and just happy & content. However, what was about to occur, I will NEVER forget.
First comes Needtobreathe... walking on stage to endless screams, bravos and woohoos, But as they start to play, Switchfoot walks on, they slowly start to join, and then Drew Holcomb, the Neighbors, Colony house, soon we have a full on jam session with the ENTIRE TOUR ON STAGE. I'm totally serious folks. I actually feel like I have a lack of words to describe what an experience it was. Again I just felt so Blessed and honored to be a part of the moment. Just some good ole friends, jammin out and doing what they Love.
You know what I took away most from that moment was? The amount of Gratitude I could see on the faces of the performers. We often forget that they are just people too. People like you and me who had their dreams come true. I saw one of them say "oh my goodness" multiple times looking out into the crowd at that moment, a few looked close to happy tears. When gratitude is palpable in a situation like that it fills me up. Good people deserve good things and I couldn't help but think in this moment that everyone on that stage deserved this Blessing. God was in the room with us, there was Love, there was talent, there gratitude and there was grace. It will always be a night I will never forget, and if any of the band members ever see this, I hope they know I say thank you, thank you from the bottom of my heart for letting us be a part of that moment, and thank you for savoring it just as much.
until next time folks, over and out.
Monday, August 3, 2015
Big decision
Since I was 19 years old I made a decision to get sober and clean. I have spent the last 7 years of my life this way. I have been a part of 12 step programs that have not only transformed my life but the lives of many people that I Love.
The amount I have learned through this chapter in my life has been invaluable. I know for a fact it saved my life, helped me grow and helped me become the woman I am today. I am forever grateful.
With that said, for a long time now I have been thinking very hard about leaving the program. If you have ever been in the program you know that these are "bad thoughts", they are negative thinking, addiction speaking for you, and dangerous. We are trained to think these things over & over again. Knowing this, when I had officially made my decision to leave, I knew how hard it would be to let those in the community know how I feel without also knowing they are thinking only sadness for me. Sad I gave up, sad I didn't recommit, sad I am going down that road.
It hurts to be honest. To know that everyone you care about doesn't trust that you trust how you're feeling. That you trust the decision you are making, that you did not make it on a whim, that you did not make it easily at all. It's probably been on of the hardest decisions I've ever had to make actually.But even more reason why I know what I chose, is how I truly feel. What I truly want. Despite how I feel I know some are hurt so this post is in hopes to explain, or heal.
Being clean stopped being about being clean for me and started being about doing it for others, I stayed clean because these people wanted me to, because those people looked up to me. Because I still wanted these people in my life. Because of the achievement which I at the time felt like I had not achieved much else in life. Being clean was my identity.
First off, never do anything for someone else if it is not being true to yourself. I have learned from the program itself that self care comes first. Just like in the airplane, put the oxygen mask on yourself before your child. I firmly believe this, so if I'm only staying clean for others how is that doing what's right for me? Second, if the people in the program who I dearly Love don't want to be in my life if I make this decision, well then I'm truly better off. I want people in my life who will support me being happy. However that may look. My only Achievement? That's a laugh, I have numerous bounds and leaps I should be extremely proud of and grateful to share. And Lastly, being clean is NOT my identity.
I AM DESIRAE and God & I choose what my identity is. Not you, not a book, not a pamphlet, not a program. God and I make a decision on what the kind of person he wants me to be, and I work my butt off to get there. I don't want to be labeled by anyone or anything that's just Desirae. I am what I choose to be, and I'm tired of caring what you think about it.
I spent soooo much of my life caring what other people think about me, it made me miserable. Doing things, only to be liked which in turn only made me not like myself even more.
The things I've learned in my more recent aging is that I have nothing to feel bad about myself for. I have nothing to be regretful and I honestly should actually be quite proud of myself. I am a strong, smart, beautiful, funny, goody, caring, Loving, passionate, super cheesy, awesome woman. I have over come so much, I have learned immensely and I am always always ready to learn more because I know for a FACT, I still don't know much. I am ready to learn forever.
My mom wants me to be happy, the program isn't making me happy anymore. It just makes me feel bad about myself. I don't make enough meeting, I don't work enough steps, I don't reach out enough, I don't make events enough. I'm sorry but I really don't want to be a part of something that causes me to feel guilt in anyway. I am not willing to sign up for that today.
With all this said, I will say that 12 Step Programs save lives, I am proof. I in no way have any ill will towards it. It saved my life, it saved the lives of sooo many I Love and I am in awe of the life changing miracles it creates daily.
It has served it's purpose in my life today. I am ready for the next chapter.
I know it all sounds so serious to some when it shouldn't be a big deal or doesn't sound like I am taking it serious enough to others but here's the thing...I don't plan on running to the ABC, I don't plan on buying a shot this weekend to celebrate. In fact I don't really see myself doing either. However I do see myself, making my own choices, if a glass of wine at dinner or a champagne toast comes around, then I GET to choose what I WANT to choose. The freedom in that is something I have not felt in a long time.
After I made the decision in my heart, I felt lighter, I really did. I am happy to see where this next phase goes, but I know wherever it does go, I'm gonna be okay. God has always got my back and always will.
I hope and pray that a lot of the people that I Love dearly in the program will still Love me in return. I know if I'm ever in trouble, if I'm ever lost or have a bad day, I can go to a meeting and be welcomed with Love. I truly believe in the good of the program and I hope that it still shows when I have chosen to walk my own path.
But again, either way, I'm gonna be okay.
I appreciate you letting me share honestly here, it took a lot for me to right this because I wanted to show my gratitude as well as my decision. I wanted to let the masses know, without a bomb dropping. Please know I appreciate the time you took to read this and I appreciate you walking on this journey with me.
Here's to the next chapter, may it be a great one.
p.s. sorry for the grammar mistakes in this one, just didn't have the edit button in me today.
Monday, July 13, 2015
back to massage
Last week I went back to Massage Envy, I worked there full time for over a year about three years ago. I got burnt out. The management at the time was really not that great, I definitely felt super unappreciated and I had one too many creeper. I mean seriously people?!
Well first night back and guess what?! Creeper right off the bat, uggghhh. Having it be my first night back and this happening I was not a happy camper. ALSO I realized if I could get just ONE regular massage on my own, once a week, I'd make the same amount of money that I do, doing EIGHT hours of massage at Massage Envy. Is this fair?!? I think not. I really wish I could get my own client base up more. If you're in the norther Virginia area let me know! I even have my county license that I paid a fortune for lol.
I go back tonight, I don't know what my schedule will be like until I get there but for now I am just hoping no creepers and good tippers.
Did you know that when you got to a franchise like Massage Envy, the money that you pay for services, barely a fraction of that goes to the therapist. We rely on tips to make it worth it. Please be nice and tip your therapist well!... Just saying.
I had a good weekend, hosted a slumber party, got the rest of the Bachelorette Adventure stuff done. My best friend is getting married in August and this coming weekend is her Bachelorette Adventure. We will be in DC all weekend and I am sure that I will have plenty to blog about upon return.
Don't worry I try and keep my life under PG-13 these days.
Also got to have some QT with my man this weekend, geez louise am I in Love, I wish I could go on and on about it but I don't know, this Love is so special I like to keep it to myself most of the time. Besides a few I'm in LOVE!!! here and there.
Hope this week is a good one, I'll keep you posted as always. xoxo
Well first night back and guess what?! Creeper right off the bat, uggghhh. Having it be my first night back and this happening I was not a happy camper. ALSO I realized if I could get just ONE regular massage on my own, once a week, I'd make the same amount of money that I do, doing EIGHT hours of massage at Massage Envy. Is this fair?!? I think not. I really wish I could get my own client base up more. If you're in the norther Virginia area let me know! I even have my county license that I paid a fortune for lol.
I go back tonight, I don't know what my schedule will be like until I get there but for now I am just hoping no creepers and good tippers.
Did you know that when you got to a franchise like Massage Envy, the money that you pay for services, barely a fraction of that goes to the therapist. We rely on tips to make it worth it. Please be nice and tip your therapist well!... Just saying.
I had a good weekend, hosted a slumber party, got the rest of the Bachelorette Adventure stuff done. My best friend is getting married in August and this coming weekend is her Bachelorette Adventure. We will be in DC all weekend and I am sure that I will have plenty to blog about upon return.
Don't worry I try and keep my life under PG-13 these days.
Also got to have some QT with my man this weekend, geez louise am I in Love, I wish I could go on and on about it but I don't know, this Love is so special I like to keep it to myself most of the time. Besides a few I'm in LOVE!!! here and there.
Hope this week is a good one, I'll keep you posted as always. xoxo
Thursday, June 25, 2015
smoothies, protein, empty wallet?!
Do you have a Robeks near you?! Let me just talk to you for a moment about my Love/Hate relationship I got going on, which has now fully turned into LOVE...
I am attempting to be more financially responsible these days, not that I am a complete financial whacko but I definitely tend to spoil more than save and as an adult I realize more and more what repercussions that actually causes and I'm just not willing to sign up for them anymore. With that said I LOVE smoothies from Robeks and tend to visit there more than I'd like to admit.
I used to be addicted to Starbucks (goodbye wallet) and when I switched to Robeks I justified this with"it's healthier!!!" but is it really healthy to be broke?! No. I think not. Today however ladies and gents I have solved my own addiction problem (yet again?) hahah. I decided to buy the whey protein that Robeks sells. I am the pickiest person when it comes to protein and I can barely get it down most of the time but with Robeks I never taste it! Hmmmm.. that was my first clue. So after buying the protein I slyly ask the dude working
(who obviously doesn't care a whole bunch) that if I can get a copy of the recipe. He flips through a book that ends up being just the nutritional facts, and with my camera on my phone already up I ask if he could just take a picture of the instructions they have posted on the wall.
He does. . . he ACTUALLY does!!! How awesome is this for me?!?! Hello at home deliciousness, I almost wish I had asked him to take a photo of the entire recipe page lol. I guess I shouldn't push my luck. But thanks to the dude at Robeks who was feeling generous this little lady is going to save tons of money by making her own at home. I will have to update you all when I make my first attempt.
So yay for small victories right? I will continue on my health and fitness journey with drinking more shakes, anddd continue on the financial responsibility journey by NOT eating out and making wonderful creations AT HOME. Stay tuned for some of those adventures to come.
Until then folks, thanks for letting me rant about my accomplishment on my lunch break :) cheers!
Tuesday, June 23, 2015
first things first?
I come across best on paper, I always have. Whether it being a writers daughter and a writer myself, I just seem to have this wonderful awkwardness that manifests itself as soon as my thoughts try and formulate into actual words in my mouth. I'm famous for being a letter writer (a story we will definitely have to get into another day) and I owe my best friendship to a high school blog that no longer exist (RIP Xanga). So with all these facts staring me blatantly in the face I figure it was time to start up again. Write that is. Blog.
Here I am. I have attempted to start a blog a few times since Xanga shut down, but it just seem to lose it's magic. Also my life wasn't that exciting. Or well it was but most of the shit was illegal so what could I actually post on here. Now that I have my head screwed on a little tighter, and my decision making process is a lot healthier. Why not share with the ever debatable public my ever debatable thinking.
I think I'll blog about just about everything. From my constant attempts at eating better and getting in shape, my professional bridesmaid skills (working on wedding #7!!!) being a massage therapist, and working at the airport.
I know you guys are excited already!!! This feels good, this feel right. till next time.
Here I am. I have attempted to start a blog a few times since Xanga shut down, but it just seem to lose it's magic. Also my life wasn't that exciting. Or well it was but most of the shit was illegal so what could I actually post on here. Now that I have my head screwed on a little tighter, and my decision making process is a lot healthier. Why not share with the ever debatable public my ever debatable thinking.
I think I'll blog about just about everything. From my constant attempts at eating better and getting in shape, my professional bridesmaid skills (working on wedding #7!!!) being a massage therapist, and working at the airport.
I know you guys are excited already!!! This feels good, this feel right. till next time.
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